I thought I was ok with them constantly making fun of me and trying to make my time in school as terrible as possible, but I’m not ok with it. Today they continued to point out my flaws, blame me for things I am not responsible for and make fun of whatever I do or say. I quite frankly can’t take it anymore. I should be able to endure this, I was bullied for years. This is nothing compared to those years. I would come home crying, I would call in sick, I would have bad thoughts. It’s nothing like that, and I am grateful for that. I guess I’m just not used anymore to be hurt in that way.
Sometimes I feel like I come off as very strong, it gives people the impression they can just say mean stuff. I’m strong, I can take it. But I can’t sometimes. Given, I have not yet cried because of the things they said or do. But I can see it happening.
Yesterday I found out that they are having a get-together. My entire class is invited.  oh wait, everyone except for me is invited. They claim I was there and I know. Thing is, in a class with only 8 students, it’s very hard to forget someone. Obviously I wasn’t there, I did not get the memo. It’s just those little, petty things. It’s so middle school, I want to throw up.
it’s just one more year. One more god damn year. It seems so far along, but at least school ends soon. Just 2 more months. I can do that, I can hold on to that thought. 52 days until freedom, well temporary freedom.  After that just 192 days until permanent freedom. I feel like I’m in prison.
When I look how much time is left, it seems like so little. It’s so close, yet so far away.
I am just tried. Tired of feeling like this. Tired of all of the bullshit I have to endure every single day. And most of all, tired of being tired.


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